Who needs Chuck Norris when you have Conrad Stoltz?!

Conrad Stoltz vs Bruce Lee

I found this email from a fan in the archives and it brought a smile on my face. Thanks Kevin!

“Dude, you are one tough nut. Get better soon. We here in Chicago have all decided you are even way tougher than our icon, Chuck Norris, thus some important facts – see below.

Be good. – Kevin

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Conrad Stoltz.

Conrad Stoltz doesn’t read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Conrad Stoltz has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it’s afraid to be on the same planet with Conrad Stoltz.

Conrad Stoltz does not sleep. He waits.

Conrad Stoltz is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Conrad Stoltz counted to infinity – twice.

When Conrad Stoltz does a pushup, he isn’t lifting himself up, he’s pushing the Earth down.

Conrad Stoltz is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Conrad Stoltz vs Bruce Lee

Conrad Stoltz’ hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

There is no such thing as global warming. Conrad Stoltz was cold, so he turned the sun up.

Conrad Stoltz can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Conrad Stoltz doesn’t wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Conrad Stoltz gave Mona Lisa that smile.

Conrad Stoltz can slam a revolving door.

Conrad Stoltz does not get frostbite. Conrad Stoltz bites frost”

Comments

cheap christian louboutin 26-11-2016, 13:04

But not just as fancy inside real life when moms wrist is actually not 2small do not pick that trigger information technology stay tight .. its sweet then again some thing yur 5year aged can make . No all much less the a okay gifts to bring yet not a wow gifts…cant go wrong if you think don’t come with far to spend on a gift subsequently see it

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Ognjen 09-04-2008, 10:05

Conrad built the house he was born in 🙂

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Nikola 08-04-2008, 20:03

Could not resist but make some images for this post 🙂 These were images of Chuck Norris vs Bruce Lee fight from Way Of The Dragon. Scene is awesome but even more awesome with Conrad Stoltz in it. I particularly like the product placement (I tried to delete the Adidas logo on Chuck’s shoes and add the Avia logo).

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